Let's make love on the newspapers that declare financial doomsday
I'm half single.
Please tell me it's the bottom half.
Meh. I'll learn enough German to ask her for a handjob, then I'm out
You never cease to amaze me.
Single handedly the worst sex I've ever had just went down. Its like we both laid there after word-less thinking about the other " could they be any worse in bed" ?
Is there a word for someone who only has sex with NFL prospects?
I dont care what I am for halloween, as long as i'm not a father after
I just dumped bong water and Bacardi out of my purse into the trash can. Everything in my purse is soaked. I hate Sundays.
that is terrible, if I can't drink Gatorade when I'm hungover I don't wanna live in this world. that's like denying wild rams to run free in the wild and frolic
You dropped a beer and it was like when wilson floated away. Complete with sobbing apologies
Shit, no womder she didn't wanna fuck me
I feel like every young boy's first wet dream is too have sex with the Pink Ranger. I am now fulfilling that dream for one man. I am a hero.
Apparently I blacked out and started wrestling with some dude last night. Just found out I might have dislocated his shoulder. Best part: he still wants to bone me
I promise that I won't shotgun beers with your boyfriend this time, Scouts Honor.
I got to walk around for eight hours wearing power armor and acting camp. No way I wouldn't love it.
I can see. My condolences to your vagina.
Just made my first drink, took 2 sips feel like god
Randomize
