where are you
in your bedroom
how did you get in
your wife…
WTF
Spotted: jayne dropping her cigarettes in a puddle...then picking them back up and putting them in her pocket. If i ever get that desperate, stop talking to me
It's just like soggy cereal, but cancerous
Puked in a cab. Passed out on my floor an my mom put a blanket over me. Home by 1045. I won shitshow trophy last night.
there's something so ridiculous to me about watching someone with glasses exercising. it's like watching a whore studying in the library. stop trying to be someone you're not.
the entire lecture hall sighed when the prof announced that there will be an exam on 4/20
Everyone is hammered wasted already...young, old, the dying, babies...we got them all
You really need to get over the whole "jail" thing. Its really not that bad.
I have the coolest burn here. Everyone is taking my picture. I'm like a celebrity of the burn victims.
I don't think ill be here long the chick I came to see is blowing rails with a drag queen
Do you think I shall pursue this journey to the center if the dick?
I think I'm drunk at the airport. Oh the possibilities
Just had an orgasim to the Star Spangled Banner so.. it was all worth it.
He's smoked my weed, stolen my cigarettes, and used my campus cash, but I try to initiate sex and NOWWW he's all "As your RA, that's a line I can't cross"
How's the party?
I'm watching two people get flogged. Sothere's that.
Stereotypically, lax bros last the longest, but have huge egos that are annoying. Baseball players barely last 10mins, but are really nice. And than we have soccer players, last long and have no egos. Me and my friends have collected our findings.
Randomize
