I just found out the guys at work had a bet as to who could sleep with me before i move away.
Who won?
All of them.
i am watching brooke knows best right now and hulk is totally dating his daughter's look a like. it is gross and disturbing.
the most pressuring question is, why are you watching brooke knows best?.
obviously you don't know the college version of myself. if there's something i'm ALWAYS willing to put up for it's alcohol.
The guy I wanted to make out with just got beat up, let's roll.
Lol I just left. He's funny and he's cute. Downside: he thinks he can outdrink us
Dreamed I made out with a stranger after falling out of a car, let's make this happen tonight.
I'm drinking wine alone, eating leftovers, and cleaning my sex toys. For the love of god, do not graduate.
You kept whispering "Party Dave" every time someone would start talking.
Tell me why I woke up spooning a hamburger like it was a teddy bear.
You were dancing with a coffee pot of rum in one hand and a joint in the other. So that should explain everything.
He has what he calls a "Ben Franklin". It's a pubic hairdo based on the man himself; long on the sides and bald in the middle.
You climbed out your own window and walked in the front door..
This girl is wasted dancing to The Final Countdown. She's grinding on a guy who came to the bar in a track jacket and a wife beater
I had to hose off vomit off my driveway at 9 am.....so hot
I just elbowed a roll of wrapping paper, and said “ohh sorry”. I’m still drunk.
Randomize
