So does your leg always twitch violently when someone plays with your clitoris? Or has my ten years of piano playing finally paid off?
I was so high I couldn't tell if they were goosebumps or herpes.
Woke up and went out for a cigarette and it was dead quiet. It was like the world just knew how many mistakes were made last night.
I just threw up in a patch of wild flowers on the side of the road. I never knew rock bottom was so beautiful.
its not that he announces that he can deep throat a banana its the fact he knows he can and it makes me wonder how he found out
says the girl that drank her shots like they were in a dog bowl
I'd say the best part of the party was when you screamed to everyone that you were gettin dome on the reg
It is. We should just be drunk all the time forever everything is like just 90% more perfect
This is that think about life weed. Thank god I'm in American lit this semester. I can actually write papers in this vat of introspective stoned.
That guy has been pretty randomly in and out of my vagina for 4 years...I don't think I'm required to tell him when I'm dating.
Good point.
The old guy next door tried to get me to go to his apartment for shots formoonshine. =-0
If that weren't so sketchy I would encourage it
Yeah it was almost as sketchy as a white panel van pulling up offering candy
I know it's my dream I got hurt enough to leave work but not hurt enough to stop drinking
Know we haven't talked but having an orgy party on the 20th if you're interested. If not, disregard this text.
Who is this?
Per my usual Thursday, I blacked out and slept on the stairs.
Really need a jack off emoji
Who do we write to about that?
Randomize
