part of me always dies a little when i go to the "2 women seeking 1 man" section in craigslist's casual encounters to find nothing there. it's tragic
just cuze she's 16 doesn't mean it's illegal to add her on facebook
They're drinking Schnapps out of Spaghetti-o's cans. Please come pick me up.
No, my body just knows its the weekend and wants to rage. Very different from alcoholism
Well... this vagina won't eat itself
I just puked in my non fat yogurt... But it's non fat in hopes that someone wants to eat my vagina
Like, actually questioning if you ate dog shit last night
I wish I could but I can't. No beer pong or sex on a hammock...such an unproductive weekend
i think the theme of this summer is "shitting in weird locations."
So if I tell her fire is hot and it will burn her... she's probably just going to keep throwing her vagina at it huh?
Last night someone asked you what your favorite color was and you said "bagel."
Is eating a dinner of fishsticks and gin mean you're failing at adulthood? I'm asking for a friend.
Was just trying to have a normal "I fucked you without a condom" adult conversation and she flipped
I have no idea, I usually just project my awkwardness out like a mating call until it draws other awkward members of the opposite sex out from the bushes
it's okay that you two hooked up in the family bathroom at the mall.. i just pray to god you were not making a family in the family bathroom..
I'm just happy stripping was the reason you fractured your hand
Randomize
