So are you the girl that gave me herpes? or was that the girl from the night before
he showed up at my house with a hand-stiched sweater that said "girlfriend?"
who knew that a girl that let me piss on her within 20 minutes of meeting her would get upset i couldn't remember her name.
Yeah apparently i got lonely because everyone was hooking up so i took matters into my own hands. I woke up on the floor spooning a vaccuum cleaner, a mop, 40 paper cups, and industrial grade detergent.
So then she just shoved applesauces in her pocket and started talking about she needed to find her friends.
you didn't get her number why?
So many lesbians keep hitting on me. I'm about to give up and just go home with the manliest one.
Well, let me tell you, it was the most vivid sex dream I've ever had. More so than the Paris Hilton one I had in 05. And about as weird.
Just dont tell him. Tell him you colored your vagina for breast cancer awareness month. He will understand.
Is there really anything more beautiful than opening a fresh box of wine on a Friday afternoon?
I don't mean to ruin your favorite Disney movie...but...we both came when Mufasa died.
He told me he wanted a penis beard so that he could look at girls faces when they gave him blowjobs. i have to say, i kind of admire his creativity
I mean I'm into guys with money but more into guys I'm actually attracted to
yeah i guess i'd rather he was hot than rich
wow i don't know if that qualifies as growing up but if it does i'm all in
You would be so proud at how green we're being. Re-using last night's jello shot containers.. saving the world one step at a time
i want to have his babies. i NEED to. shit i wont even ask for child support, he's that goodlooking.
i just sexted for my mom while she was driving, i have hit an all time low.
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