I just walked by a ginger with a mullet. I repeat GINGER mullet. So help us God.
I thought it was weird that her dad told me to finish and get out after he walked in on us. I like him
hahhahahha. mid doggie-style, i faked an asthma attack. the sex was that bad
just broke no shave november. hello backed up drain december.
I only had sex with her cause she looked like jwoww from jersey shore
I just found glitter on my vibrator... whatever we're doing has to stop
Quick question: how long can sperm live in a rug?
somehow this turned into a costume party you have to get here now with my banana suit or I'm wearing my birthday suit
He took getting"shit in your neighbors hot tub drunk" way to literally
i woke up and found a picture of his grandma in my purse.. im a kelpto
Let us ponder on the good times. Ya know when the Jonas brothers were incapable of growing facial hair and I didn't fully understand what a dick looks like
How many nights in 2015 can we have no one get injured, run away crying, or get into a brawl?
i put frozen meatballs in my drink thinking they were ice cubes and I'm vegetarian wtf
i ate her out in full view of all her roomates. the word awkward doesnt even cover it.
I would give away three of my own ribs to be able to eat myself out.
...ew
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