I will be home in 10 min. Dont be beating off on the couch
enter at your own risk
I'm pretty sure the only race ive ever won was to my mothers egg
Are my feet made of real feet?
I'm this close to masturbating to his profile pics from 2006
We sat in his closet and drank four loko out of my camelbak for an hour in the dark. You tell me how my night went.
Our penis' have led to more networking than mark zuckerberg.
OMG HIS EYES ARE POOLS OF SEX. HOT SEX.
He asked me not to hook up with anyone else because it would hurt his feelings.. while his arm was around his pregnant girlfriend.
Is it bad that I've been making new friends through your vagina networking? I don't think so
You don't know weird until you've had a musical wet dream about your older brother.
Don't take advice from me. I'm simultaneously shitting and eating cheesecake.
he's so hot I'd consider breaking the whole, "till death do us part," agreement he's currently in
Shes yelled my World of Warcraft name when we were having sex, I think marriage is next.
A condom was pulled out of your vagina by a doctor today I do not think you can pull off "closet" hoe anymore
We are bad people. This is why we are friends. <3
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