Well you know what I always say about freshmen.... If you want it, and they've got it... get it.
I love how my brain works. It's like being on drugs without the costly upkeep.
what is college for if not random hookup sex?
learning.
i would literally fuck learning if i could.
Most the numbers in my phone are mistakes. It's a virtual graveyard of people I should never pick up for.
he asked me to help him wrap his girlfriends birthday presents. Dont worry we fucked right after.
you refused to come out of the bathroom until i asked you in spanish
There comes a time in a man's life when he's almost thirty he just needs to stop watching Degrassi. This is that time.
Tried to make out with a statue, turns out it was a person.
So I'm at the VFW tonight and the shot special here is straight 151 for 2 dollars. They must hate our livers
Woke up with a text saying "when I get to see them titties again lil ma??" With 8 beads around my neck & an empty bottle of vodka in my arms.
I mean, I would have, but I couldn't come up with a logical reason to bring up oral sex during an orientation.
I bought a mink out of the back of some guy's van on my walk home from the bar yesterday
Only I could turn my one night stands into class essays. Go me.
i walked into her house and she introduced me to her family. i dont think she understands the term booty call
Saddle up bitches, we're going to an orgy.
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