come outside for a special surprise it involves huge boobs
new low: just stole a ciggarette from a bum sleeping on the side of the street.
ohh what kind?
P.S. theres no milk for breakfast, but theres plenty of beer or red wine. you decide.
the boys lacrosse roster just went up... now we can see who we had sex with
Its against the rules to not make you aware of his virgin situation prior to penetration
Yeah, she tried to drown her but then they hooked up.
Nypd just made jon and hayes chug their forties.
she's like the billy mays of hookups...touch my boobs and i'll throw in this blow job ABSOLUTELY FREE
Hot Damn Cinnamon Schnapps make me feel like the sun is punching me in the face and a bear is sleeping inside me.
Just bought weed from the ice cream man. The kid in front of me got a tootie fruitie.
He whispered "Are you feeling it now Mr. Krabs?" when he was inside me. That is NOT my fetish.
He called my vagina "the man cave", and I found it charming
You also spilled beer on my dog and tried to wipe it off with a paper towel but he kept getting away from you.
I'm a grown ass woman, I need to get fucked
So unmotivated today.
Who am I kidding. So unmotivated this decade.
Randomize
