the thought of Anne Coulter teabagging Dick Cheney kills me everytime.
And then I have a slight inkling that I went up to the bar and tried to order the bartender.
Just got arrested at PF changs. Happy New year, China
We did nothing beneficial to ourselves, or our country last night.
She just sat there, all alone, with a bottle of booze. And the dog. He even looked like he didn't wanna be there with her.
In other words, he somehow found his way to my apartment, wasted, and was naked on my new couch. Completely naked. It was too special to pass up.
Get your ass over here, we're drinking Patron and watching My Little Pony. Patron and Ponies, do you copy?!
We get an extra hour of sleep. That means we can take an extra shot tonight. Sound logic. Thank you daylight savings.
I heard moaning and ass slapping and sponge bob.
I stole an accordion from the bar
Accidentally
I'm having ragrets about stealing the accordion
Glitter fights sound a lot funner in theory.
I like to send nudes ok? If that's my biggest flaw I think I'm ok
So hypothetically speaking.. say someone dropped their birth control pill in a hot bowl of soup, and it possibly disintegrated.. would it be just as useful?
Are you drunk? You left me a voicemail at 5:59 AM of you making dolphin sounds.
Three cheers for handling my crush on my boss in an entirely reasonable manner, by having a threesome with my coworkers.
Randomize
