my phone is set on vibrate and its tucked up in my left front pocket. call me back 20 times real quick.
his grandma walked in on us. twice. and he was truly fucking surprised when i put my pants back on.
Only you would think wine and coffee was an acceptable finals study time mix
we've been together for three years, and i still get excited when i know i'm going to give him a blow job. it's that kind of love
Do you think that my Facebook profile picture kinda look like im being raped by a 10 foot polar bear ?
i want to go make food but i'll have to face my mom after telling her that the random i'm sleeping with, whose name i don't know, told me I was "too slutty to be his girlfriend" when i was drunk last night
Why is my vagina being sacrificed for yours? I'm sure he would take a piece of you too. Your turn.
She had a tattoo of Luke Bryan on her thigh and she made me waffles. Can I have two fiancees?
Kid got so high from the brownies he forgot his own name. Welcome to college.
he offered me cocaine within 5 minutes of my arrival. yes of course i'm keeping him
It's okay. I think we're back on. I just went on a dog walk with him n blew him on a sidewalk
I like to send nudes ok? If that's my biggest flaw I think I'm ok
Got kicked out of the club and woke up at a frat house. Good night? Couldn't tell you. I got a date out of it I'm glad someone thinks my drinking problem is cute.
If I die tonight, you and your brother can split my money evenly for college only.
all $38?
I'm sitting in the car vaping at an elementary school to try and deal with the stress of existing. About how i thought being 30 would go for me tbh
Randomize
