its like his balls were made of silver and he was trying to polish the tarnish off
M WATCHING THE HISTORY CHANNEL AND IT SAID THAT WHEN THE LUST PART OF THE BRAIN IS ACTIVATED THE JUDGEMENT PART IS NOT. THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
In the middle of pouring my wine you asked me if I could hear your vibrator from my room.
Shot gunning beers for breakfast. You better be ready for today.
Just used "I used to work as an inflatable toy operator" as a pick up line. Freshman frenzy is great...
It's all fun and games until you throw up hot cheetos in your drawer.
Your grammar in that last text message was so awful.. My vagina wants to go crawl in a hole, and never speak to you again.
Going through my bras is like traveling back in time through my past hookups and relationships....
just really comprehended the fact that I'm getting high at the same place I used to play as a child. the nostalgia and thc is mixing together in one, intense wave. WHO HAVE I BECOME
I was on all fours trying to empty the bowl we smoked into the sewer when your neighbor came out, but besides that it went smoothly
all night she kept rolling over and mumbling something about wanting an extendable retractable urethra.
he told me that he only likes small dogs. I should have known he was going to end up being little bitch.
i was really depressed when i left the health dept this morning after i had to write a higher number next to "partners" than "age"
Ignore him I am the one that wears the pants in the relationship while "the big man" cries in bed
I Projectile vomited a massive question mark on Brent's bedroom wall. Don't tell him it was me. I want him to play the whodunit game.
Randomize