I just used Master P to describe what sound the letter U makes to my daughter...
you ate skittles off the table like a hungry hungry hippo. it was awesome.
i wish semen tasted like chocolate
5 Four Lokos being cheaper than a case should be illegal.
For a second, I wondered if I could smoke pizza.
Having a race with the dryer. Seeing who can get drunk/dry clothes faster.
They're doing a Bong-A-Thon for 4/20. I don't care if you quit. You are coming out of your weed retirement for this.
Vaginas creep me out. I'm disgusted by the look of them. I wonder if this is what having an ugly baby is like: you have to take care of it and love it but it just hurts you on the inside to look at it.
I'm sorry, you might have to start setting aside some time in your day for my pussy.
Last night I dressed up as a cowgirl and walked into McDonald's. I bought 20 mcribs. There's pictures
Oh my god there's only so much masturbating one can do before one wants to fucking cry
Is it okay to thank someone for the orgasms they gave you, even though they weren't with you?
the worst fight me and my gf ever had was over Guy fieri
I just didn't expect to have anal in a retail store at 9 AM on a Tuesday.
ill drive you to the airport today if we can have sex first
i left yesterday
ill pick you up from the airport on sunday if we can have sex after
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