Would it be quicker to bike the freeway home?
the guy working at the drive-thru just asked me if i wanna bang after he gets off work tonight.
given your current drought situation, im genuinely curious to know what your answer was
i told him maybe and gave him my number. sad? probably. but even if the sex is bad maybe i'll get a free burger out of it
her tits were misleading. turns out she wasn't cool, smart and funny
Did I show you my penis last night?
beware of the wheat thins...there might be a knife in it
please stop judging me for buying a handle of soco on a thursday at 10am. it was on sale, i'm thinking of my future.
He is stood at the top of the stairs nursing the stolen cat
Yup. Can I borrow your penis decanter for my Xmas party on Saturday
Plus he stuck it in when you were sleeping which would have been the tipping point for me but you art school kids are all liberal and shit
Just in case the world ends tomorrow, I have an emergency contact group of booty calls I can send a quick "let's fuck" to before I die.
I imagine it like the scene in Sorceror's Stone, but instead of flying keys, it's flying dicks.
That is a dream.
She shoved her hand down my pants and held my cock for thirty minutes in the bar. It was like she was letting all the other females know I was hers.
Good morning! Or after noon. Sorry for falling asleep in you
That man fucks like a champ. The sex was so good I did him again in the morning just to be sure
He flipped a shopping cart in the back room and had to leave to make a jazz playlist. If we aren't in love then i don't know what love is.
Randomize
