How does, "Im sorry I was such an intoxicated bitch, I didn't mean anything I said" sound as an apology.
protesters in toronto definately have the best pot
Can we please just celebrate being alive this far into the school year and just get drunk?
while we were dancing I voluntarily took my bra off and hung it around his neck as a necklace. 2011 lets go
I'm using my ex boyfriends dog to find a guy at the park I could see fuck buddy potential in. I'm the queen of irony.
A guy with no shirt on and a eyepatch just got out of the car beside me. After he slammed his door into mine. This is our hometown.
Come over so we can hookup and eat tacos. Those are 2 things you can't possibly turn down.
You know you gotta reevaluate your life when the first thought that comes to mind after you wake up is 'at least I'm still alive'
This tequila is so bad I might cry. I won't Throw up but I might cry
I had sex with a boy who lives in a closet, that's like having sex with Harry Potter, right?
its a recording of you guys having sex?!
its actually 30 minutes of him begging and then 2 minutes of sex.
You ripped his router out of the wall and screamed "I have defeated the matrix"
How do you confess that you've had phone sex with your fiancé's brother's ex-girlfriend's new guy she's dating who has also slept with your best friend?
I'm still thinking about that amazing orgasm last night. I literally heard angels singing "Hallelujah!!"
Sexual Dilemma - Covid Edition: Flirting with a cute frat boy. The Cougar in me wants to go back to his frat house and fuck his cocky brains out. The adult in me doesn’t want to get Covid and have to quarantine in a frat house for 2 weeks\n
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