you're kinda like the weird girl from The Breakfast Club after the makeover. i mean you're pretty, but you're still weird as fuck
She was sleeping without a shirt so I thought I wouldI sneaked a peek at her nipples..than I realized they were just warts...on her back.
I'd call her a cunt, but she dooesn't seem to have the depth or warmth.
She said my dick tasted like a junior mint. Ive decided im using this soap the rest of my life
Well, love is in the air. And by that I mean: it seriously smells like sex in here.
I am VERY upset that you called my fiesta a waste of time.
I just ate a can of beans for dinner so I can afford to go get a 5$ bottle of wine. I really did not think these choices would still be necessary at age 25.
All I wanted was a hug. You dirty, dirty whore.
I almost itched my nose with the lit end of a cigarette. Help.
If it involves mee putting on a bra and discontinuing my 11 am drinking my answer is a polite fuck YOU
I cannot describe the pre-ejaculative horrors thru the medium of text messaging
Is it socially acceptable to be blind drunk at half five on a Monday afternoon?
Which pub are you in?
I'm not the one who gave a guy that lives next door to my grandmother a blowjob in a pub bathroom in Ireland, you have no room to judge.
Actually here it's more "lie around naked in a dark room" weather.
I just threw up on the way to class. Legit, on the sidewalk by psych building.
THAT WAS YOU? Psych prof just pointed out the window and said "that kids, is why you don't pregame before class"
Randomize
