My mind said no, but my drink said yes.
last night i used 411 to try and contact britney spears.
dollar well spent
My mom wanted me and my brother to have some bonding time before I left for school. Our bonding time consisted of us smokin a few bowls then goin to Red Robin to cure the munchies. Ooo how I love family time :)
the lighter is IN the bong. I don't know what to do
someone just sent me a bong wrapped in christmas paper in the mail. signed 'santa'.
Sending me a thank you card for letting you fuck my sister was completely inappropriate
Btw, whenever you feel discouraged about your life, think about me being frantically upset bc my mobile porn site limited me to only 5 videos a day
I think I should advise against you hooking up with a guy that throws "the shocker" up in all of his pictures on facebook. Just sayin.
I renamed his cat Jeff last night. Well I spray painted it on him.
Also, my aunt grabbed my phone and downloaded the scriptures. Apparently I need Jesus.
Donald Trump looks like someone photoshopped hair onto a dick pic.
Apparently the cops had to handcuff me in order to get me to come with to the hospital with them. They asked me if I had had any experience with handcuffs before and I replied, "Only in bed." What a life
we bonded over knowing every word to freaky gurl by gucci mane so it’s kinda starting to make sense why I gave him head in his cul de sac
I’m home. Please don’t call me unless you have an arterial bleed or you’re on fire. Love you 😘
Do dollar stores sell vibrators?
Randomize