I wish I could drop acid with the muppets
im spending all my christmas money on new years parafanalia aka things I will ingest or lose by the next morning
It was one of those "since we're naked anyway" type situations
So the girl in front of me was buying champagne too .. I wanted to be like "so are you celebrating clean test results too?"
i have a wrist watched drawn on my wrist that it says shot o clock
Bank of America: Available balance is $546.25 on 03/04/2011 for account 8428. Go online for details. TextSTOPtoStop/TextHELPforHelp
i loe djcudia fjxos rue.
There is nothing scarier than watching yourself breathe in the mirror while on shrooms.
Serious question...Is it possible to get a DUI on a kayak?
I don't know what it was about last night, but every bar that i went to there was at least one girl there that i had done something with. I'm sure the girl that i went with knew because they all grabbed my penis and told me to call them.
Playing nyquil pong with a cat again
She called it a palate cleanser. She and her friend dike it out once a year before returning to dick
Together or do they pick up? How far do they go? IS AN AUDIENCE PERMITTED? GODAMIT ANSWERS MAN!!!!!!
In other news I may have fractured my masturbating arm
At least it wasn't your drinking arm
I told my mom I'm great in bed. That is quality mother daughter bonding.
I felt like I crashed a wedding. Everyone was dressed so nice and I was covered in actual dirt and a little blood.
Just sent a nude with the caption "seasons greetings from our family to yours"
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