if you don't go to jail tommorow I'll buy you a 40. Motivation.
And then she said we stopped for a train and i tried crawling out the back window.. again, i dont remember this.
You ordered a "mcblizzard" and yelled @ the worker for false advertisement because she didn't flip your "mcblizzard" upsidedown. You wanted it free. I'd say mcdonalds daytime workers need to be trained in dealing with daytime drunks too. She didn't know what to do.
How was the bike ride?
Nope. High in the basement. Fruit cups.
it's fine if we fail the bar, we were never going to satisfy the moral character requirement anyway
Yeah, the furnace guy just pulled out 4 empty and 1 full beer bottle from the vent. You are no longer allowed over.
Yeah, all the sudden I heard a loud "ding" and realized I had been passed out on the dorm elevator for about an hour....
how you manage to cockblock me from 500 miles away still baffles me.
She has puke in her hair, is missing a shoe and is now crying. People trust her to be their child's teacher
He ate me out while I was wearing a tiara.... I think I could get used to this
i want to shrink myself down to penis size, climb inside of her pussy and just live there for a few months.
holy shit I just remembered that story I told about Tom hanks going bowling while high.
I'm trying to find some better sex background music so his neighbors don't hate us. This is tedious.
I'm trying to behave my vagina this week so I can at least pretend I'm honoring the sanctity of marriage
just call my name and ill be there, if we are puking, beating up bitches, or pickin up men, OR avoiding wierd men, so many situations require a wingman
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