Also, I'm sitting at a crosswalk watching two Mexican gangs fight each other. I miss you too. A lot.
She rode me to the beat of Baby Got Back. I swear to god.
I think we should see other people.
Already working on it.
when she asked me if it was possible to swim under north america i knew it was time to leave.
His drunk text included an attempt at quoting a Nyquil bottle in MLA format
Which genius got me a voicemail of myself puking?
So what's the moral standing on reading gay porn on your phone whilst sitting next to your 87 year old Grandma?
I still have the video of you three making soup in my kitchen and asking random people for permission DURING the party, not after like usually
Don't remember, didn't happen
I HAVE THE VIDEO YOU DICK IT HAPPENED
Let's make an agreement. No drugs until you finish all your homework. I'm hiding them as we speak.
I maxed out my credit card last night on powdered donuts and beef jerky
Apparently, Lolla sends you an email every time you use your wristband to buy a beer.
21 new emails...yikes
I have beer and butt plugs...pretty sure I will find a way to entertain myself while I wait
i'm not too sure if he's up to my expectations looks-wise, but in the penis department he exceeds ALL regulations.
I came home and drank a bottle of wine in the bathtub. I have AMAZING coping skills!!
Is it too early to start looking for freshmen penises to corrupt with our liquor and yoga pants?
I was just wondering the same thing! Gotta be any day now
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