is your mom at the bar?
You are a beautiful, beautiful young lady. Your heart is made of tissue, blood and love. I will call you very soon, Princess Sophia.
Im drinkin out of a coconut! I think im gonna dip my balls in it!
The mall is playing a fucking country mix of lady marmalade.
welcome to maine.
im sorry but my first introduction to your dick isn't going to be a pic sent from the men's room
he used a semicolon in his bootycall text, of course he's not gonna go down on me.
He took the lighter and said "this is how I give myself a bikini wax."
I've gone to the bathroom 3 times. And forgot to pee. 3 times. Let's say we call it a night, I need to be found. I see a fish tank by the bar and some stairs.
Don't ever tell me I'm a bad friend. I woke up at 7 this morning to drive your mistake home because you wouldn't get up.
He got up when I started trying to balance my wine glass on his head.
Sooo Zach and Judd are on my porch drunk eating leaves and flowers...
She's impossible to please. Other than with two fingers and a tongue.
Mashed potatoes are always the fuckin answer ok.
Ask him to BK for an ice cream cone and do him in the car. That counts as a date
Every time we have sex, I feel his dick ramming my soul into submission. Problem is..... I LIKE THAT SHIT!
Randomize
