D3 body, D1 cock
If she didn't want me to pass out in her bathroom, then she shouldn't have such a furry rug in there
do you ever lay in the bath and watch the blood hit the water?
EWW. Don't discuss your period with me. You can go shave your back now.
what made it akward was his girlfriends dog watching us have sex
im trying not to drink and cry in the same night anymore. i'll let you know how it goes
He doesn't fuck you and he's married, why do you keep letting him cum all over your stomach?
In the hopes he'll just put it in one day?
There is a visibable outline from you in the grass. its you in the fetal position...
He smashed a plastic chair leg on a tree stump, threw himself into the side of our metal enclosure, stomped on the wreckage for a bit and then punched the fire.
A blow job from a tiger shark would still entail less risk to your genitals than having sex with her.
I can't wait till they start promoting the testiciplasty. Turn those old prunes into fresh tight kiwis!
According to timehop today marks the 3rd anniversary of my 1st blackout
Im gonna go lick parts of my apartment. Good night and be ever vigilant, you never know when I'm coming to epoxy your hand to you nipple.
Remember that time you puked in the middle of wendy's?
Yeah, why?
The staff still remembers me for cleaning it up. Thanks for the free frosty and fries
You need a new phone. When you talk it sounds like the teacher from Peanuts while she's trying to give a blowjob.
I had a date last night. His dog threw up in his bed while we were having sex in it.
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