Would you rather have a 10 inch but pencil thin penis or a 2 inch very fat one?
Fat, it's not about touching the bottom it's about raising hell of the sides.
You were humming mission impossible as we ran from the cops
I'm pretty sure that I'm earning a horrible reputation with your friends, but I'm having a fucking great time in the process.
I just beer bonged. Soco and spite please get on my levvl my hair is in buns
raced the clock twice to day to see if i could get off before my computer died and before i left for my noon bar crawl... win, win
lets go back to having secrets in our friendship
They were taking shots out of the caps of perfume bottles. This is too much for me.
her dad gauges his nipple piercings.
it's my favorite when the couple downstairs are having sex so loud that i feel like I'm part of a threesome
second-hand sex is fun, isn't it?
That would be an interesting position... Not entirely certain how that'd work!
Gravity is no match for my libido
I should come with a disclaimer that reads "bad at relationships and defensive when confronted about it"
or maybe "WARNING: picks fights when bored"
The worst part about being a grammar Nazi is all the porn I skip over because the titles are misspelled
You're the third Mark I've fucked in that bed.
STOP IT RIGHT NOW IM BEING A SINLESS CHILD OF GOD IN BED TRYING TO SLEEP AND YOURE SENDING ME MEMES ABOUT DICKS
Disregard everything I texted you last night. Oh, and disregard me hooking up with your boyfriend.
No I'm not high but I did cry for over an hour tonight because I realized that they never made a sequel to "Under the Tuscan Sun" with Diane Lane.
Randomize
