On friday while at the hotel bar by myself (creepy) I made friends w/ a millionaire who said he may be running for the position of mayor in richmond va (likely a lie). At one point during our discourse he asked if I was crazy. In the effort of full disclosure I looked him in the eye and said yes
I don't know what prompted his inquiry, clearly this man had impeccable intuition
oh jesus shes a lukewarm mess
the only thing i can think of after seeing avatar is "when are they gonna make avatar porn?"
watching "look who's talking now." getting choked up at the end when they find each other at the cabin
doesn't that movie star kirstie alley and have talking dogs in it? new low...even for you
my self respect just called, its having a good time without me
Dude sorry but it totally wasn't worth going back in there for yous shoes
Code red. She won't talk to me. Maybe it has something to do with her raccoon eyes. Perry said there was a brief moment of towel fighting until you passed out. Did you draw the turtle on my ass?
The least you could do is send me some gibberish so I know you're alive.
Fuhga
Thank you.
What's clit gel and why is it in my wallet.
I just masterbated to the Lets Get Ready To Rumble theme
Honestly, the only reason I've been productive today was because I ended up organizing my apartment while searching for my vibratory charger.
I should have known when she said it would be "fun" we'd end up in the hospital
We will just distract him with tacos and porn.
Why are you barefoot at a strip club?
i feel like the girl with kaleidoscope eyes except the kaleidoscopes are sparkly butt plugs
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