idk hes just been lookin at me weird all night
he probably just wants to cut your skin off and wear you like a body suit
I think getting shot is the thing to do in Brooklyn
By the way the awkward moment from yesterday is now a bad situation I have to figure out.
Thank you Grey Goose.
My stomach is making the worst sounds, probably because there is nothing but semen in it.
So I had a Liz Lemon moment today....went to Chipotle to get my "cheer me up" burrito bowl for the 4th time this week and the chipotle guy sighed and said always the same huh?
she fascinated with the iron the back of the toilet seat. she made me sit in the bathroom with her for a solid 10 minutes while she just stared and laughed at it
You need a sexual gate keeper
i don't know why he's complaining, i'm the one with four hickeys on my ass.
Dude we gotta go back to your cabin. left glenn. he's calling me crying and still drunk
You've never really lived until you tell someone you have an STD over snap chat.
This girl just said she was late for class because she was having sex.
THERES A BEAVER CHASING ME, ANGRY BEAVERS IS FUCKING REAL DUDE
I'm wearing a sports bra. Of course I'm not getting laid tonight.
it was the most awkward makeout ever. it was record breaking really
...i feel like you have a lot of those.
don't worry, i'll dog sit again, the barking made the sex better, its like he was cheering for us, we were just THAT good.
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