I wanna bring you to show and tell
bahahaha. this guy working at subway literally has someone's name tattooed on his arm, crossed out, and another name below it.
she asked if i had a condom...i said yes...when we finished it wasnt on...told her it was at home on my dresser.
he said he wanted to butter my pancake. i thought it was sexual, but he went downstairs and made pancakes. i need to stop dating fat guys.
I smelled my fingers after she left and they smelt like sugar cookies. I want that one again.
then mid-sex he looked at me and said "i hope this is as good for you as it is for me" and kept going.
Yeah I hope so. Definately just saw two freshmen in very authentic togas and cotton ball beards. This new class is stepping it up.
There's a Sam Adams brew house. How were we not supposed to go
She had one drink in her cleavage and another in her hand. She kept rotating between the two by leaning backward and then sipping the one in her hand.
Theres a handprint of sauce on my frig, one streaked across my face, a trail of it to my bedroom and sauce all in my bed and i have no idea what the fuck i ate.
Also I spent like 2 hours on the hubble/nasa website sunday night looking at pictures of outer space and cried my face off at how beautiful and complex it is. What's wrong with me?!
when I said energy drinks I meant cocaine
If I get one more "oh yaaaaa he changed your oil" texts, I'm gonna lose my shit
Gay?
German.
Pity.
Hey I didn't mean to come across like I was judging you about your liberal sexual choices. I would like details of your threesome if you need to talk about it!
Randomize
