How wet are you?
Ever heard of a U-boat?
If I'm having a dream where I'm having sex and I can actually feel it between my legs because I've had a lot of it recently, does that make me a whore?
I have a feeling this is a serious question. Problem solve, Jess.. I'm going to let you figure that one out on your own
Then she called me a home wrecking whore.
dont they live in a condo? that doesnt count.
then he said "your boobs looked so much bigger on girls gone wild"
I forgot about that,good spring break.
This is the last pregnancy scare i've had since i was 12 and i thought you could get pregnant from masturbating.
Apparently there was a point in the night that they literally thought he was dead, ass naked on the floor. That bad.
Dude, I fucked her last night with nothing but my bandana on. Like straight Indian chief style.
Jesus, I just want to drink. Also simultaneously punch things and rub my vagina on them.
When the sex is so good, you need three fans and have to chug a gallon of water after
What have I told you about trying to use Jesus as your wingman?!
Fuck you. Leave my nipples out of this. THEY DID NOTHING TO YOU
I have put on lipstick and signed up for class. Nothing more shall be expected of me today.
You owe me a one night stand and a line. Possible an inflatable flamingo as well. And a caesar salad.
The air tonight was full of shame when we saw each other.
Well if u wouldn't have had sex on the front porch last night I think that could have been avoided.
If I shall die, I wish to bequeath to you my personal library, my sigma tau delta presidency and all it's apparel, and a puppy.
Randomize
