carls jr on main st. japanese tourist taking a dump in the urinal. reading a japanese newspaper and wearing a full suit.
be there in 3 mins
I didn't mind getting the stomach flu from him. we had great sex AND I'm seven pounds lighter
trying to figure out who visited the hillshire farms website enough for it to be in my top sites.
You kept yelling that her vagina looked like a hatchet wound.
Guys, I'm sleeping in the BOYNTON LAUNDRY ROOM. if you can, come let me out in the morning as I have no keys. I might be in the study room possibly. DON'T FORGET. I will be trapped
I think I love you, but I may be biased because we had pirate sex.
She rode an inflatable shark down the stairs. Viva shark week.
bro, your right, i shouldn't feel embarrassed about taking shots from a penis-shaped ice sculpture
You tried to impress her by kicking the 5th floor button in the elevator, but you ended up kicking everything from 3 to 11. Then you said, "pretty accurate, huh ladies?"
And by pregame I mean drink heavily and watch Russian dash cam car crash vids
So after taking my shirt off, he pulls my bra off like a hockey jersey. FUCKIN PRO. Guy knew what he wanted.
Like he was trying to be sexy but he had shit taste in porn so i left
right now I am washing the alcohol and shame off from last night
that may or may not have been my penis.
FYI - Don’t go in the downstairs bathroom. Ryan is passed out naked on the floor with a raging hard on.
Randomize