At a stoplight watching a woman push groceries in a stroller while dodging oncoming traffic... Reallllly Detroit?
winter break is gonna be like a weird mixture of rehab fat camp and holiday cheer.
I just saw the list where the U.S. doesn't even rank in the top 10 in drinking countries. I know its Tuesday but....its for America
The last thing I remember is pushing my way into the bathroom and dumping a 40 on him. We havent talked since.
The main two things I remember from last night is you "spanking Katey into reality" and watching her barf in terror.
Woke up with a raging boner...good feeling abt this trial
The face that yo gabba gabba comes up when I'm stoned and searching for yoga workouts is scary or dangerous
So that's all you want from me. Easy ass.
And an everlasting friendship
I woke up in a poorly constructed blanket fort on a strange office floor covered in rug burns and champagne. How was your night?
Haha ohman remember when I peed in your blender? Gotta love college.
YOU DID WHAT???
You, me, naked, mistletoe, fifth of jack, gallon of lube, condoms, Cheetos, handcuffs, rope, along with no morals, inhibition or judgment. That's all I want for Christmas.
My ass is underappreciated
Why'd you print out every dick pic you've ever received and tape them to the bathroom walls?
he called me his ex's name during sex then proceeded to cry while still in me
God... We're terrible. I'm so proud of us.
I know! It makes me feel all warm inside. Or maybe that's just me getting closer to hell.
Randomize