we need to get ahold of those "sexting" teens on tyra. HAWT!
wasnt one 13?
Not really fighting over the same girl. He takes her out to dinner and then I come over and fuck her. We've worked out the perfect relationship.
all of your clothes are in the front law. btw..sprinklers go on in 20 minutes
it was really bad. he went around saying "I want you inside of me" to everyone.
This kind of poor decision making requires a real cup, not a mason jar.
Babe, I need to be clear. I DO NOT WANT TO HAVE ANAL. Never. No anal. No "talking about it"
You tried to sled down the middle of the street. In. Your. Coat. Of course you are bruised.
I found this letter on my leg this morning "dear sober self- we are one body now. It's weird but get used to it because it already happened" who the fuck is lionman?
you did a full monologue with your sober self last night. different voices and everything.
Haha! I've never met his girlfriend, so my main focus will be not saying,"you're the only person in this room that doesn't know what my vagina feels like."
I asked her why she was drunkenly masturbating to Iron Man and all she replied was "Robert Downey Jr". As far as excuses go, that seemed pretty legit.
In unrelated news guys should not ask what I'm doing/wearing if they can't handle an honest answer. I'm not pretending I'm not sitting on the couch in yoga pants watching Community so you can beat off.
My skirt was too short for the church and I brought my flask to the Scrooge play. God bless us, everyone!
AMAZON SELLS SEX SWINGS!
Blacking out in the security line at the airport is not nearly as fun as blacking out in the lunch line at the dining hall.
Randomize
