I just heard a girl say "We can't go that way, it is a one way street." She was on foot...Nothing worse than girl from the midwest that move to NY to "live out their dream" -the dream of living in a rat and roach infested 200sqft for $2k a month, and get fucked by some recent Ithaca college frat grad...
Drunk on an escalator. I fell like 15 flights of stairs without actually moving more than 5 feet.
It honestly wasnt my fault this time. i was in shock. WHO THE FUCK OWNS A PEACOCK?!
Before I left he asked me if I could submit my panties for the frat house undergarment chandelier. I said yes
I doubt were getting our security deposit back... the toilet just fell off the wall
Haha I will however wear glass and and draw a lightning bolt scar if you want to have sex that way, and that can be the only time you can call me Harry.
Got into the physics lab with my student id, hooked up over break when school was closed. I regret no payments for tuition.
She just asked me if I was looser "in the vagina" than her. While gyrating.
Made myself shower before I'd masturbate. I probably should have wined and dined myself too, but that's pushing it too far.
before the moonshine you were already braiding the bouncers beard -_-
that's how you measure success
By how bad my vagina hurts on a Tuesday morning while I'm trying to figure out how I got white girl wasted on a Monday?
Thing I actually said tonight: "I want to achieve Ultimate level drunkenness, I'm only at Champion"
I'm sorry about all of the innappropriate shoe throwing
After the day I've had, I can't decide if donuts or fireball would be the appropriate priority.
I am certain that you would be a mere freckle on the behemoth of slutty that has taken place at this complex.
Randomize
