i just smoke outta the biggest bowl i've ever seen. the kid was totally compensating for a tiny weeenie.
I wouldn't necessarily call it an addiction, more of a passion. I'm habitually passionate.
being able to look good while almost puking is a skill that takes a lot of puking to develop.
It's been decided..lingerie is an investment. You get free breakfast and cab rides out of it.
I'll send you the picture of you double fisting vodka bottles, grinding one guy and making out with another... Every girl wanted to be you.. You make me so proud!
Before I roll over explain to me why you're naked and on my floor.
Doap. Just bring some lube and a slingshot. Not sure y we need the slingshot.
I didn't want to have shaved for no reason, so I told him I'd blow him if he would just come over and appreciate the smoothness of my legs.
Someone broke in while we were at the bars, window is shattered but nothing got taken
Noone broke in, matt tried to pull a tyrese and punch through the window... were at the hospital.
When he mumbled "I can't feel my legs," proceeded to stand, fall over, and just lay there I knew I'd given great head...
I'm kind of upset that he wanted to have sex instead of watch Harry Potter. I mean it's Harry fucking potter.
Ur dad just showed me a tit pic he got omf
He started planning our future mid-hookup. You tell me how my night was.
i'm pretty sure my brother is still drunk from last night. he's telling my parents that humans are at the top of the food chain for a reason and listing off all the exotic animals he would eat
apparently ive been in a long term relationship for the past 1 1/2 years w/ out knowing
Randomize