hell yes lets make some ravioli
i don't have parental supervision. i'm gonna start accepting candy from strangers now.
of course he's cheating on me, she's 100x prettier and she can do the splits
this is the second time this week i got a blowjob from a crying girl.
there's a girl in the coffee shop just eating a pint of ben & jerry's
SMART GIRL
he stopped midthrust to put on his sex playlist and the first song was 'can you feel the love tonight'
where do you find these guys?
The bartender asked if I wanted a to-go cup for my crown and coke.....I just realized I'm back in Montana and fuck did I miss home.
It's like the blind leading the senile over here.
UPDATE: shit just got real- grandma is threatening to beat grandpa with a wooden spoon covered in chili.
Had a grope session with a girl who looked like my Mom and had the same name as her as well. I think therapy is in order.
It's been two whole weeks and I haven't missed a single class. I deserve 69 blunts.
I wore my Gollum shirt. It struck up a conversation AND got him staring at my boobs. That's a win-win.
The last time I saw her someone was carrying her on a bike and she was yelling that she was E.T.
Remember when I made fun of you when you ran out of toilet paper on your brother's birthday and had to use coffee filters? Guess what happened today
Dude... the time we have in life to be young and trivial is so incredibly short. I think we should drink tonight.
Why is there a horse in the backyard?
I stayed at my gfs last night. This is all on you.
Randomize
