I want to do you till i cant cum anymore. Till all i get is a little flag that says "bang".
The crazy thing is, I dont actually know where the cat is, she said something bout the back of the toilet and a sock.
The only problem is i have violated all potential new years resolutions at the new years party.
i was mowing the lawn and found the coffee pot in the bushes
i was able to set 4 alarms to make sure i woke up in time for class but i couldnt take the open beer out of my pocket before i did cartwheels down the hall...
Washing vom off hardwood, so much easier than carpet. Thank you adulthood!
The kid in the park, who was on a leash I might add, looked at us and yelled "stranger danger" before hiding behind his dad
For her birthday she wants to, " try something different with our butts a funnel and a bottle of whiskey"
ATTENTION ALL CONTESTANTS OF SLUTFEST 2012 ; not only will we be judging on how many penis you have sucked but also girth and length will be calculated. If you are found lying you will be disqualified. Remember your fellow participants will be rendering the same services to probably the same people. So choose wisely and let the games begin!
Oh my god. I'm not ready to be an adult. I'm not ready.
So your best guy friend eats your pussy once and a while, no big deal. It's like going to jiffy lube once and a while to let the professionals do it. Your husband should understand .
He said, "cum on daddy's dick!" ... I pictured my dad. That just scarred me for life.
Who the abstract fuck do you think you are!?
Sorry I had sex in your backseat while everyone was in the car
It's quite alright. I found his shorts in my backseat, not sure what he was wearing when we dropped him off
Drunk twilight is the only twilight
Randomize
