i mean i cnt help that this campus has the highest STI rate
just to let you know, don't open your linen closet for a while until i come over with a cleaning kit and geek squad
NEWS FLASH: A bottle of wine can fit into a taco bell cup.
Turns out Woolite can get the cum stains out of her moms couch.
just saw 2 fat kids fight for the last slice of pizza. Litteraly fight. God Bless America
He kept saying "this is a bad idea" wasn't in his vocabulary. He left at 2 came back at 6 eating frozen waffles and he had a symbol, a moped mirror, and a new MacBook. I'd say he had a good time
I need you to stand in the corner and ref this threesome. Wear stripes.
Wise words from the guy who drunkenly chipped his teeth on the sidewalk
Crosswalk actually
I'm doing lines by myself in the kitchen. I think your outside. yeah that's you. your naked.
So you think it's my fault? I didn't give you the 10 shots you took nor make you eat the brownies we made... btw, i found your engagement ring, it was in the last brownie you wouldn't let me have while dragging me to my room.
After some trial and error I found soaking my balls in maple syurip helps ease the pain.
Agreed then we'll really be on our A game tomorrow. And by A I mean alcohol.
Drinking from the bottle. In bed. Making dinosaur noises. Oh man.
I am actually offended he hasn't asked me to sleep with him yet to get better grades...I wanted the whole college experience.
Listen, you can either give me drugs or an orgasm. You decide.
Randomize