Guess who has two thumbs, loves booze, and just dug half a handle of rumb out of a trash can in a freshmen dorm? This classy gentleman. Good day to you sir!
If a girl is wearing Ed Hardy from head to toe, does that make her a douchebagette?
I feel that my census will not be the first census submitted soaked in beer
Ihop lady gave me free pancakes for being sober this time
All I can see in the pic you sent is white shorts...
Thas my pasnts in colleg! Tehy glow! AND SMELL LIKE BEER!
Teasing with taco bell is not funny. High or sober.
In a weird way, I don't want to stalk him on Facebook. I want to find out what's wrong with him the old-fashioned way. Is this what it means to be romantic?
I drunk-cried for all conjoined twins everywhere the other day.
Im currently watching two girls making out. In the library. Hope your studying is going as good as mine is. Haha
There was a trampoline and tequila. It was glorious.
I really shouldn't have to tell you to stop banging your lightsaber on everything while we are in college.
the only joy I get out of her anymore is hitting on her friends and ignoring her. it's chaos for them. like shaking a slutty ant farm
Knowing that porn stars want to fall in love is the weirdest thing I've found to be beautiful recently. I'm so lonely.
Only a true best friend would remind you to make sure your cucumber dildo is organic
I have acquired a mango...tonight is successful so far
Her name is susan
Randomize
