Having a conversation over beer pong about a threesome I participated in...it's only Wednesday
she sounds like chewbacca in bed
I need to figure out what I wanna do with my life.
There are margaritas in the freezer still.
having to delete all your hookups stored in your phone as first name followed by frat/bar after they've graduated is such a bittersweet feeling
we all know badassery is carried on the XX chromosome
I made a drinking game out of watching your DUI video, everytime you say " okay, well thats just your opinion"
Say what you want, but those Fraggle Rock DVDs have gotten me laid twice.
He kept stopping sex to whisper in my ear, and the only thing I could understand was "double stuffed oreos"
Being the hot sister definately has advantages, I'm pretty sure I ruined her engagement
A person can only vomit Fireball so much before they quit it forever
I just broke a sweat masturbating on a Friday night. I may need a boyfriend.
For a guy who came before his dick was out of his pants, he gave surprisingly good head.
He took a shot of vodka and AND ATE ME OUT AS A CHASER. YESSS. I AM IN LOVE.
Went online to check my credit card... $147.87 at Waffle House. $632.36 at "Red Rose Gentleman's Club" and a $1000 cash advance from an ATM. I may no longer be a fiancé.
He made me cum 3 times, then immediately after sex packed a bowl and passed it to me. Yeah.. I'll keep him.
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