worst hand job ever. my dick is about as raw as that sushi your mom wanted me to try.
its like my vagina has this homing beacon out to all the guys saying "come find me, i havent been shaved in weeks"
omg kevin jonas gave his bride a glass slipper..could he be any gayer then he is now
he is so gay. he makes clay aiken look straight. what is wrong with the lady that married him? kevin must be envious of her balls
He didnt have condoms & didnt trust himself to pull out. Thats when I knew he was a keeper. So I blew him so he knew I was a keeper too.
True romance of the 21st century.
She literally just puked and rallied AT HER OWN WEDDING. Welcome to White Trash town, America.
And then he told me he was too tired for me to suck his dick. Physically and mentally too tired for me to suck his dick. What the fuck?
I'm just pissed at the whore who takes over my body when I'm blacked out.
Oh Brad. Your poor brain, always being ignored for your penis and crazy women.
He walked away from the girl that just blew him to hook up with another girl, and when she got pissed he just turned around and screamed, "SHE IS LIKE 10X HOTTER THAN YOU!" Then she went on an angry dick sucking rampage. There were 4 victims.
He used the ring emoji and we've gone out four times. What is my life.
I think my brain has decided it's boycotting life until it can do whatever it wants.
It's not "nice." It's the supermodel of dicks.
Thx for last night. I've never had so much fun while being told my life decisions are questionable at best.
How was I supposed to know the accent was fake before i slept with him
Fucking a younger guy is now a game of odds. The chance that he gives me corona virus is outweighed by the evening of orgasms I know he’ll give me.
Randomize
