Just so you know, I have a bf.
I guess as long as you bring single girls over and cook cannolis you will still be useful.
You know you're wathing too much reality TV when you start adding commentary to every day life.
the only thing i can think of after seeing avatar is "when are they gonna make avatar porn?"
just a heads up, there may or may not be a mailbox full of the leftover beer on the table in your basement.
And then somehow we were arguing over how to fold our arms
Your dad needs a mid life crisis affair thing, I could totally be that girl.
and I keep making him eat me out and buying me presents, this is paradise. I wish he cheated on me earlier.
just go where the car takes you. fingers crossed its here with breakfast.
Last thing I ever expected to say, "Get your finger out of my ear or I will stop sucking your dick."
dude he's still passed out in my bathtub. and his dick is half way in a 40 bottle... i really hope he was just trying to piss in it
'twas the night before moms weekend and all were blacked out. Not a coug was sober not even farm house. I was down to fuck but you were not in sight, so I bid pullmania a sweet goodnight.
He was on top and as he finished he yelled "I love gold" , so yeah I'm seeing him later tonight
I was 40 minutes late to work today because I was getting fucked. Walked in to discover that it's apparently performance review day. Employee of the year.
Walk of shame through Chipotle? Check.
I think it’s appropriate to celebrate the start of mother’s day at the bar with the men that almost made me a mother
Randomize
