At Coney Island the sign for the rollercoaster The Cyclone says, "Make sure your glasses and weave are secure."
I am not sure how to feel about the fact that I was turned on by someone with a penis. I can't believe Lady Gaga would do this to me. :(
just read twilight to her over the phone, while in the bathtub, candlelight...i'd love to say no homo but that was so gay.
Dude, she uses Old Spice. It smelled like I was eating out my grandfather.
chatroulette drinking game turned into a foursome.
She narrowed it down to 7 guys that could have gotten her pregnant.
Pissing in la rieve gfox. Jer zsyuis diu drunk but it felt amazunbg
Dans le librearie ivetre. Hjhaha
this may be my drink champagne alone in a bbaby pool in the dark night
I forgot that places existed where drinking on Sunday is frowned upon. It's just so unreasonable.
How bad would it be to ask my maintenance man for new blinds because the dude puked on those too?
Yeah. I woke up in an awkward three way spoon with him and his sister. Tequila!
Went home with a male stripper who looked like Justin Timberlake.. I started singing cry me a river mid sex. When he sang along I fell in love
Whose house did we sneak into and play beer pong for 4 hours at last night?
I honestly have no idea
Finally fucked my buddy's mom!! We are both ten years older and for her it really shows but i hit it!!
Were we still high when we decided to break your leg?
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