Hold on, I'm google imaging "vagina close ups" to see if mine match up
I hope you shit your pants in a socially devastating situation.
im trying to catch a child molester. call you later.
We've finally come to the understanding that as long as our conversation stays stricaly sexual, we get along.
She's like the Michael Jordan of alcoholism
He just climbed off me and used my hairspray to fix his hair. If he hadn't just gone down on me I would think he's gay.
just found out they live across the street from coke dealers... rethinking the new years resolution
You need to let him know my only agenda is coke and sadness.
I picked up a chick last night on crutches wearing a I am boobman tshirt. I love raves.
Here you are just trying to masturbate and I'm talking to you like your an initiate for some secret society.
She's like the Oprah of therapy. AND YOU GET A STRAITJACKET. AND YOU GET A STRAITJACKET. WITH A PADDED ROOOOM
I fucking hate them. They came over and sat on me and made out. On top of me. Who the fuck does that?
Decided to stay in tonight. Completely sober. Just got two drunken booty calls within 5 minutes of each other. This is my life.
Basically, I am an endless fountain of unconvential sexual experiences and knowledge.
I almost suffocated in that mask but she kept calling me Jeremy so I kept it on.
Randomize
