New Low: Just set a reminder on my phone for me to check on things I need to harvest late on Farmville.
i had a dream that i had so much marijuana that i didn't know what to do with it. i woke up and cried.
In the middle of switching positions, we shared a line of coke. It's was like a modern-day 'Lady and the Tramp.'
I would like to apologize for asking to take advantage of you, wishing you a horny Hanukkah and whatever "abd ethw prnym to mzbe yur penis cna be friends" means.
Also managed to rip my pants and set myself on fire. And oddly enough I'm still not ready to ask for 2010 back.
and then he tried plucking my nose hairs. lines were crossed.
I feel like today should be a " im going to have sex with you cause its raining and theres nothing else to do" kinda day
It took me fifteen minutes to go from puking on my doorstep infront of my old lady neighbor to legit presentable person able to care for children. Bronzing powder and I deserve an award.
You're lucky you got out when you did, about an hour later the girl in the Franzia box started wrestling everyone.
Definitely but only if you hit on the 16 year old in the karate class as part of your waffle and gin fueled sexually deprived rage.
I think weed is turning my hair brown
I was orgasming and dying of laughter at the same time. I think I've found the One.
Thank god he came over. I had to have some good sex to makeup for all the bad sex I've been having.
I thought you couldn't go near Germans after that restraining order
At least your nickname is not Plunge Slut and that nickname is not in a published thesis work
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