i told him that if he starts being sappy its friends = off. he called me jerkface and drew on me w permanent marker. im either in love w him or we are twelve.
Yea. But u kept saying "as long as she doesn't have aids" so I was concerned
Not even the dog will look at me anymore.
He asked if I wanted to leave my bra on while we were doing it from behind bc he read somewhere that all that pounding can be painful for big breasts. THAT thoughtful.
It's safe to say that our attempt at trying to fuck in the grand Sierra elevator was a bad idea.
We need to reprogram your vagina to say "no"
I figured you left because I was a shit show. Were you still there when I got locked in the bathroom and didn't know where I was? If not, that could have been a dream. I'm still not sure.
We did a lot of coke and Bedazzled the couch. It seemed like a good idea at the time.
Drunk me made out with someone's girlfriend last night, was invited to their place for a semi-threesome, and then walked home at three am. Can't decide if this is better or worse than drunkenly challenging everyone to taekwondo sparring matches...
I AM VODKA MAN
he only noticed i dyed my hair purple like halfway through sex and he looked really shocked and he just said "You look like Barney." as he came.
At a point I was just cumming dust last night
Slept with the roommate last night and also discovered that she believes in eugenics. I may need to slow down my drinking
Dont be alarmed when you come homeand see a guy handcuffed to your bed. His name is james. Ill uncuff him when I get home
I once broke a mans heart just to get laid by a premature ejaculator
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