Wow that girl who lives a couple houses down is going out wearing butterfly wings a skirt and fishnets
M and I are hungry and we are making your pizza in the fridge. But you're having sex and we're not so we dont feel bad.
I just want to hang out with her.
You're a liar. Why do I have to give you reasons you can't have sex with my mom? I hate you.
"auto-tuned camel" is how i'd describe the noises she made
After 10 years all I have gotten is one bra pic, at this point I should be able to draw your cervix from memory
She brought up feelings... her days are numbered
The Swedes wanted a tensome.
Why is there bacon braided in my hair
the lesbians just got naked and went into the ocean... this never happened when i was a camper.
I haven't had an orgasm since 2014. So you cam see why I'm having a bad year.
I told ya. I'm super awesome at making things super awkward. I'm the Awkwardnator.
i just used a selfie stick to take an ass pic. i hate myself.
Already doing pt exercises by picking my margarita up off the night stand. Fuck yeah.
so i showed up to the bars in a sombrero and a tie as a headband... so yeah, they didn't let me in
Regardless I WANT TO BE YOUR SEX DISPENSARY. that is like the career I was born for.
Randomize
