she came over and started getting naked and said its not like i came over to just hang out
youve hit the jackpot
Minivans at bars can only lead to bad things.
I am the poster child for what not to do during sex. Soon they will be calling an undesired position after me
My suggestion that we all just smoke some weed was greeted with a uncomfrotable silence and a 'maybe later'. These are not our people
He went into the alley to piss and came back a minute later with a case of Bud Select. I'm speechless.
The sex I just had was not worth missing a girls night out.
Sorry I couldn't make it...got a scrambled voicemail, all I heard was "Bring the dildo"
Thought about you all night last night, then I fucked the shit out of my boyfriend. Win win for me.
You can't just beat off while driving someone else's car. Thats a rule
Thats your rule and this car is nice
Where are you and why are you fighting with a bird?
I'm sorry I called your mother a reasonably-priced receptacle.
Sorry this is the worst night of your life and that you're being a baby about it.
He listens to me complain and in return I send him naked pictures. It's a win win situation
Bruise count after new years, 7. 2018 is looking up.
I feel like you should store your weed in something that suits your personality. For example mines in a hollowed out disney princess book.
Randomize
