Assholes at mcdonalds drive through wouldn't serve us last night even though we said we were on small motorcycles that were to small for them to see and weren't heavy enough for the sensors. We made noises and everything.
The guy i fucked last week got done first on the test in my 900 person class. If im pregnant at least it will be smart.
The first thing they saw when they walked in was all four of our std test's hangin on the fridge....i'd be worried if they didn't think we were sluts
In the middle of getting a blow job, she looked up at me and said "this isn't the first time I've done this today"
In fact, not a good idea to go into any house alone after a man invites you in from his balcony.
She sprinted out of the bathroom and ran all the way into the middle of the street. Five minutes later she came back with a banana nut muffin. She's that kind of drunk.
Dude she's famous. She's on an episode of campus pd. Can't not fuck her
I just woke up in my ex-boyfriends bed, with my new boyfriends jersey on. I love March maddness.
Its everclear night, yall need carbs in your body!
Even though he had a fractured vertebrae, the sex was still phenomenal. Better than normal actually. I hope the vertabrae never heals.
Lets just say I tried to pinky promise the cop... So I was fucked up.
I also woke up in a guys bed in a Reptar shirt yesterday morning staring at a movie theater sized poster of the not as popular Air Bud franchise movie Super Buddies.
I bought a mink out of the back of some guy's van on my walk home from the bar yesterday
Can we do lunch at 3? I have a blowjob scheduled for 2.
You schedule blowjobs?
I mean she did throw a tantrum because you wouldn't let her suck your dick
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