we need to drink 2009 down the drain
It's gotten to the point where NOT peeing in the sink feels strange and uncomfortable.
I told her I was horny and she said to forget it because she has vagina drama.
WHAT IN THE HELL IS VAGINA DRAMA?!
i dont care if i had to wear a dress to fuck her, she was super hot and i stand by my decision
there may or may not be knives in your bed. I would check
I wonder if that one guy remembers you sticking salami to his forehead when he was passed out on new years eve.
I don't care how old I am, if it's your 21st birthday I'm going to make out with you.
All I know is when I checked my phone this morning google translate was open with "help the cow ate my robot" translated to French
I'm far too poor to be letting my hookups wear my shirts home. I'm down to about a total of 8 shirts and have no intention of buying more
Well. I hope my dad likes whatever sweater stoned me picks out.
I found her outside drinking steak sauce out of the bottle.
I just turned down a booty call because I'm having a Star Wars movie marathon
They both showed up at the same time... to surprise me. One had flowers and the other had chocolates. Needless to say, I will be at the bar all weekend long trying to figure out how this happens.
It may be a corded vibrator from the 90s but it gets the job DONE
Listen I don't care what it's called as long as it's drugs
Randomize
