More tranny stories later!
first missing my period. then crying at the clinic... but why?
we had sex 3 months ago. you missed your period 2 weeks ago. but nice try.
so i had a choice between studying for my physics test on fluid dynamics or spend the night with my girlfriend. hello doubletasking.
My phone now changes "me" to "mrrrrrrrrh", thank you new years.
Is it bad when your hot neighbor is crying on her porch, and your 2nd thought is "maybe her boyfriend cheated on her and she'll want to fuck me for revenge sex?"
Perfectly normal.
I woke up wearing nothing but his lifeguard whistle..
he got mad becuase i made more noise when he gave me a back massage then i do when we actually have sex
We are finally out of the honeymoon stage of the relationship because it turns out that you can't come back from peeing on me in your sleep.
It's 1:26 and I have already found 5 fruit flies between 3 separate glasses of wine. This is supposed to be a summer problem. Fucking global warming.
Either of you know why the shower was on and the bathroom door wide open with no one in there at 6 in the morning?
That shit was hard as fuck. It felt like a mountain entering my vagina.
Adulthood is punching a guy in the face when you find out he's trying to fuck you and he's married instead of fucking him regardless and believing anything he says
I love you. Go after that dick
i woke up face planted on your ottoman..thanks for letting me sleepover
Dick is the cure to depression. I'm almost positive. And cough syrup.
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