"Monday" is guna come over...
but its Thursday?
yeah, but she cant make it.Monday can...so there ya go
ok think of it like jelly beans. if you can learn to like the licorice ones, youll always have lots of them because no one else wants them. its the same with fat chicks
She just wrapped her tongue around my thumb.....lizard girl may be my next wife.
I feel like I'm back in highscool trying to hide my erections at work
i just sent my parents are gone come over I have condoms to my mom because Derek changed my numbers while I was passed out
But I always wanted my obit to read "Died violently in casino orgy," not "Never woke up from rectal surgery."
U should just post that picture of u two on facebook with the caption, does anyone know this girl? If so please tell her to take plan b, thanks
sex in a tree stand. check.
you lucky bastard
Ahh, 151. Think of it this way: it took one shot to get you buzzed, I took eight. I may or may not have broken a tv with my skull that night and met someone's parents naked and hungover the next morning.
It's meant to be, Cynthia. You, him, and your developed breasts are meant for each other.
TOPLESS DRIVE THRU! I have no money and my dignity is at an all time low.
I did however clean up the cupcakes and vomit so I'm not that bad of a roommate
AND I woke up to eggs in my bra. Thanks Taco Cabana...
You got your ass kicked outside KFC on Tuesday
he's a mother fucking interior design major!! we boned and fell asleep and now we're laying in bed discussing what color i should paint my room. i'm marrying him
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