so while we were having sex, he stuck it in my but, and when he finished he goes next time can we have anal. i don't know if that means im tight or my butt hole is loose, i choose to think the first one
WHY DOES GOD HATE MY DICK
I have discovered something important. The trick to making food taste better is not always 'more hot sauce'.
i'm drinking with a bunch of phds, i feel very stupid but good about my drinking abilities
we fucked the fort apart but we'll rebuild it after we get some drinks.
He always takes me to get taco bell after we hook up in his car. It's sort of become a booty call tradition.
Just face planted the stairs. Apparently Santa brought an extra step while I was at the bar... Fucking dick
she broke up with me the week she got divorced. maybe I should grab a beer with her ex
It is officially settled in my mind that fuck the hot grad student is THE goal this year
Drinking hard cider in a room full of freshman girls. Never felt so secure of my manhood
I probably wouldn't
man sorry about that. It's like god was willing me to be an asshole. I haven't filled my quota for the day
I DIDN'T WATCH THE PILLSBURY DOUGH BOY PORN!!!!
Yeah, everything was going great until the mugging.
Yeah, so if you ever try to steal it, just know my tongue's been on it in several occasions. All over it.
I didn't really break out of the friend zone, as much as I blasted the doors off with high explosives and rode through on a grizzly bear...
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